I never liked waiting…

Even when I was a child waiting was a struggle!! That “1.of December-feeling” always bothered me. Only 24 days till Christmas was full of mixed feelings. Impatience most of all. But at least I knew what I was waiting for!

In Norway we say: “Waiting for something good, means you are not waiting in vain.” So what about those who don't know or understand what we are waiting for, what about waiting for something not good at all, something horrible?

I don't like waiting!

And I don't have a good answer to myself these days. I am worried, I wonder how long I have to wait and I am not quite sure what I am waiting for. I look around me and the world sort of looks the same as yesterday, but I know that it is falling apart, and has been for so many years. It makes me so sad and frustrated to have so many questions and almost no answers. 

Waiting is inevitable.

I have to accept that I will be waiting without knowing how long! So how do I keep my spirit up, how do I keep smiling, how do I manage to be a happy guide both for myself and for others?

I admit it is hard and I struggle with a lot of thoughts and emotions. A part of me wants to stay in bed and sleep until we are there..until this chaos has ended until we have arrived in a place where I recognize my friends again and the sun is shining and the dark clouds have lifted. But we are not there sometime soon!!

How do I wait?

It seems like the best idea is to turn inward. To stay even more away from news and social media. To comfort the little girl in me that hates waiting and feels scared. My dear friend Anne Day is such a vise woman and she helped me see this a bit clearer. Change HAS to come from within and for me to feel a responsibility for the whole world is a bit too much.

Taking care of me and giving love to me is the best way for me to take care of the world! 

Where focus goes energy flows. 

It is not easy to decide where to put your focus right now. BUT it is possible. I am in charge of my energy, just as you are in charge of yours. I struggle and fight with myself every day to make sence of myself in the world, just as you probably do. We are all in this together, we are all waiting. So instead of pointing fingers at everybody else and waiting for someone else to change the situation in your favor, let's start inside! Be the change you want to see! 

I love you!